Seattle Makes Huge Splash With Kraken Unveiling

Huh. They really did it. After being a topic on Spittin' Chiclets since 1979, an NHL expansion team actually avoided the usual safe, boring nicknames* and instead went with something that has a little mystery and creativity around it. Granted, a kraken isn't a real thing and had no prior historical ties to Seattle. And, much like the Toronto Raptors, the naming definitely has the whiff of a pop culture-influenced move. But that's all good because after seeing the logos, colors, and jerseys, I'm fucking sold and glad the league's newest (and likely last) franchise went outside the box a little bit to embrace the weirdness.

Not only did they really do it, they really nailed it. That's a sweet jersey with a menacing look thanks to the eye and tentacle. The color scheme is pretty sweet and, more importantly, doesn't remind you of any other pro team. The shoulder anchor with the Space Needle top gets a chef's kiss. Gotta give props where they're due and Seattle has made their presence known globally in just a few short hours, as the logo has been dominating social media since lunch (ET).

I know the S is a nod to the city's past. But it could also be a nod to your grandmother's secret stash.

Thank the maker they didn't go with Metropolitans. History aside, the name sucks donkey dick. Plus, it would've gotten shortened to Mets and then they'd be inadvertently tied to that loser franchise in Queens (love ya, Clem). Apparently, it was ruled out because of the division with the same name and I'd never thought I'd appreciate having an NHL division called the "Metropolitan" so much in my life. 

Given the NHL's history in this realm, I did not have high hopes that I would be happily surprised at noon today. But here we are. Now let's watch them pilfer 30 other rosters for that '22 Cup run.

*---The last good, new nickname dropped by an NHL franchise was the Coyotes back in 1996 when the Jets moved Southwest. A desert dog was perfect. Of course, people forget that the kachina K9 logo was roundly mocked when it debuted and only became "beloved" after the passage of time.


Carolina Hurricanes: I just think there's always at least one better local option than a natural disaster.

Nashville Predators: I love Nashville. Place will always hold a special place and me and Grinnelli's hearts. The logo is great, especially if you're familiar with the origins.

And the team even managed to pull off yellow home sweaters. But Predators is generic not to mention the skeevy connotations.

Atlanta Thrashers: I guess there was some bird of prey thing going on in the ATL back then but the logo and name were boring and the NHL's second foray into Georgia would prove to be as ill-fated as it's first. But at least the first one gave us one of the all-time great looks and names (burning a city down isn't a natural disaster). 

Columbus Blue Jackets: Speaking of Civil War-inspired nicknames, Columbus went with the unique choice of honoring its role of being on the right side of a domestic conflagration that killed over 600,000: "Ohio contributed more of its population to the Union Army than any other state, while many of the Blue Coats worn by the Union soldiers were manufactured in Columbus". It's a nice tribute but I don't think it makes for a particualry compelling look, logo, or name. But it sure as hell beats the alternative---the Columbus Justice. 

uh oh oops GIF Giphy Images.

Minnesota Wild: While I'm a fan of the two-for-one logo, the nickname was always a bit meh and too non-specific. How have their game ops not incorporated Duran Duran yet? It would be the most exciting thing they've done in 17 years.

Anaheim Ducks: After Disney sold the team, the pop culture property-based "Mighty" was dropped and the OC squad went to just plain old "Ducks". Jesus Christ, if there was ever a time for a complete overhaul, this was it. Ducks aren't scary or intimidating. They were mostly known for getting killed on Nintendo or decapitated at the end of A CHRISTMAS STORY. I wouldn't be surprised if Burkie toughened up the team just because Ducks was such a pussy name.

Winnipeg Jets: After the Thrashers flamed out in Atlanta, they headed for Manitoba and reheated up "Jets" in the microwave like five-day-old Chinese food. Zzzzzz.

Vegas Golden Knights: After legally beefing with the Army, the desert stopover for GIs was able to use Golden Knights. I thought the name was underwhelming then and my views haven't changed. However, what the team has done to build around the name/motif since has been impressive as hell and their pre-game show became the talk of the NHL. Still, with the vast desert surrounding them, I was hoping for a bad-ass native animal. 

Partially got my wish...